Getting “Past” Gone

Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now in this instant of time. From this moment onwards you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed.  ~  Eileen Caddy

I like to take a good look at my past on occasion in order to gauge how far I have progressed.  Staring or dwelling upon it for any reason other than gleaning it’s lessons does not work for me.  I do not need to fall into a “could have, would have, should have” condition.  That’s a short road to a long depression if I decide to go there.  As long as I do  the next right thing now and keep love and kindness close to my heart I continue to evolve.  Developing into who I am at this moment in time has been slow but steady.  My mind, as well as my horizon, has expanded, becoming open and accepting of almost everything put in my path.  Negativity, dark thoughts and unbecoming action are quietly being left in the dust of the past and I continue to move forward.  The rest of this life is stretched before me like a canvas; waiting for me to pick up my brush.  I hope to create my masterpiece.

What’s Dominating Your Destiny ?

Once you exercise fear and make it your practice, once you try resentment and make it your habit, once you employ aggression and make it routine, those actions will dominate your destiny. No matter how painfully you’ve been wronged, stand in love in the midst of a huge temptation to be vengeful, prideful or hold back. The real nature of love is that the person you think has betrayed you the most is actually an agent of the divine offering you the opportunity for grace.  ~ Mary Manin Morrissey

From firsthand experience I can only concur with what Mary Manin Morrissey is saying.  I’ll guarantee that by feeding and watering these “seeds of pain” they’ll grow quickly and become a part of your daily life.  (If you’re an active alcoholic you can even get an extra helping of Hurt that will go along nicely with your always increasing irritability and discontent).  Fertilize with plenty of Drama and just see how soul-sick you can become.  Those “seeds” will develop into a very healthy, extremely strong and toxic vine and it will work slowly on strangling its host, Your Spirit.  With a warped perspective, bad choices are made on a daily basis and you dig in deeper.  The people, places and things that are causing your discomfort aren’t going to go away unless you let them go; sent away with love, no conditions attached.

There is a paragraph in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous that reads “If you have a resentment you want to be free of, if you will pray for the person or the thing that you resent, you will be free. If you will ask in prayer for everything you want for yourself to be given to them, you will be free. Ask for their health, their prosperity, their happiness, and you will be free. Even when you don’t really want it for them, and your prayers are only words and you don’t mean it, go ahead and do it  anyway. Do it every day for two weeks and you will find you have come to mean it and to want it for them, and you will realize that where you used to feel bitterness and resentment and hatred, you now feel compassionate understanding and love.”   This seemed easy enough to me and I liked the part about even if you don’t want if for them or mean it,  because I didn’t.   I knew I had to start somewhere so I started out praying “GOD, bless the son of a bitch”.   Every day I prayed and slowly it changed.  After a couple of weeks my prayer had progressed and came to me in love.  It was softer, gentler and forgiving.   I realized I truly meant what I was saying; that it felt good.  I’d had a change.  I was freed from that resentment and allowed the 180 degree turn from darkness to light.   By the grace of GOD I was given a new outlook on the situation, realizing how much easier it is to approach a problem in love.

I haven’t by any means gotten this down to an exact science but I’m getting better at it.  There are days when I repeat the words “tranquility and serenity” over and over in my mind to keep these feelings away.  I’ve also prayed for many other “sons and daughters of bitches” since that day and I may have to pray it again.  Who know where my mind will try to take me if I get on the bus with it again.   I have to keep focused on the good and stay off the bad.  All  is well even when the boat starts to rock if I pause and think before I react.

Today I am aware of my connection to the Universe and I am more at peace with myself and others.  I’ll gladly take that over living in my mind while attaching negative emotions to negative thoughts, in turn creating inner turmoil and drama.  Life has taken a great turn and GOD continues to bless me beyond my wildest dreams.

photo:  http://www.csindy.com

Affirming My Thoughts

Affirmations are really anything that we say or think. Our thoughts create our feelings, beliefs, and experiences. Too often they are negative. We say, “I don’t want this in my life” or “I don’t want to be sick anymore” or “I hate my job”. If we want to change or manifest something in our lives, we must state what we do want.  We must affirm that we are willing to see ourselves or our lives in a different perspective. Thus, we can change our experiences by first changing our thoughts.   ~ Louise Hay

If like attracts like then Negativity attracts itself.  I know it can breed with amazing speed, just like The Flu.  It can create a very Sick Puppy.  But unlike The Flu the person with the downtrodden, negative or bummer attitude usually doesn’t even know it’s there.  It is so ingrained in their thought patterns it seems “natural” to them.

I’m sure you know someone like this.  There’s the person I don’t want to run into when I’m in a hurry because my casual, “Hi!  How are you?” usually elicits a reply that I’m 99% sure is going to be a (long) story about A Bummer.   Or, there’s the guy who has had the Same Problems, Different Day for way too long.  He’s still beating his head against the wall;  hasn’t done a thing about changing his ways and has no idea why his life sucks.  I know women and men who have been in dysfunctional and co-dependent relationships forever who constantly complain about their  situations but can’t bring themselves to leave.  Their heads can’t wrap around the fact that they could be happier if they would just stop controlling, being controlled or both  (Just Say NO!  No More! ).   These are just a few examples but these are behaviors I’m familiar with.

Affirmations are an effective way for me to keep Negativity at bay.  When I came out of my “Coma” I started to listen and learn.  I realized there was more to life than being on The Pity Pot and Hitting My Head Against the Wall While Trying to Orchestrate it All.   I learned that words are powerful and using negatives such as No, Not, Don’t, Can’t and Won’t (to name just a few)only hindered my progress.    By using a positive approach with affirmative words and actions I am able to process my thoughts and feelings and turn “it” around which, in turn, prevents The Flu . I don’t want to spread any Germs.   I’m not perfect but I’m making progress.  I’m happy, healthy and whole today.   For this I am truly grateful.